Joke: Politically correct language

klee

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For men and women...


HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" -- She is a
"BREASTED AMERICAN."

2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" -- She is "VOCALLY
APPRECIATIVE."

3. She is not "EASY" - She is
"HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a
"LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION
SUPERHIGHWAY."

5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED
COMPANION."

6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is
"REALITY IMPAIRED."

7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets "CHEMICALLY
INCONVENIENCED."

8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is "MEDICALLY
ENHANCED."

9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes
"VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is
SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED."

11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is
"PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."

12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a
"LOW COST PROVIDER."



HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a
"LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is
"OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES
ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in
"FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers
"GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."

6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes "ACCIDENTALLY
HORIZONTAL."

7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ***" - He develops a case of
"RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has
"SWINE EMPATHY."

9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP
CHALLENGED."

10. He is not "HORNY" - He is
"SEXUALLY FOCUSED."

11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants -
It's "REAR-CLEAVAGE."
 

cdubb77

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10. He is not "HORNY" - He is
"SEXUALLY FOCUSED."

Yeah, that's me. :D
 
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