What the hell. You got keyed again? You know it was some ricer or a high school kid.
If I caught someone keying my car this is how it would go down:
"Hello, tire iron or ice dozer?"
"Ice dozer??"
"Ah, I see you have fine tastes."
When you pull one of these bad boys out of your trunk they'll think its some kind of power tool so thats equally amusing as their calls for help fall on deaf ears: