***Official Joke Thread***

[blacknight]

THE HORTH WHITHPERER



If you don't laugh out loud at this, you're just not trying!!



A guy calls his buddy, the horse rancher, and says he's sending a friend over to look at a horse.



His buddy asks, 'How will I recognize him?'



'That's easy; he's a dwarf with a speech impediment.'



So, the dwarf shows up, and the guy asks him if he's looking for a male or female horse.



'A female horth.'



So he shows him a prized filly.



'Nith lookin horth. Can I thee her eyeth?'



So the guy picks up the dwarf and he gives the horse's eyes the once over.



'Nith eyeth, can I thee her earzth?'



So he picks the little fella up again, and shows him the horse's ears.



'Nith earzth, can I thee her mouf?'



The rancher is getting pretty ticked off by this point, but he picks him up again and shows him the horse's mouth.



'Nice mouf, can I see her TW@T?'



Totally mad at this point, the rancher grabs him under his arms and rams the dwarf's head up the horse's fanny, pulls him out and slams him on the ground.



The midget gets up, sputtering and coughing.



'Perhapth I should rephrase that. Can I thee her wun awound a widdlebit?

 

[slowaccord]

^^that joke is hard as hell to read. for me it wasn't funny

 

[twokAccord]

 

[blacknight]

^^that joke is hard as hell to read. For me it wasn't funny

lmao

 

[blacknight]

A Cowboy walks into the bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms

and says, "Honey, this is the cow I make love to when you have

a headache." The wife, laying in the bed reading a book, looks up

and says, "If you weren't such an idiot, you'd know that's a sheep,

not a cow." The guy replies, "If you weren't such a B!TCH you'd

realize I was talking to the sheep

 

[sikjdm]

Re: Teh Shoutbox??? (MERGED)

[/quote]

[/quote]

 

[CHID0]

^GREAT POST.....but i think it's the wrong thread


Here...

 

[juicebox00]

go to this, http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/1OSwga/www.thealders.net/humour/slice/slice08.html

 

[blacknight]

According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington
was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were
beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine,
but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips on the
mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night the maintenance man
would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back. Finally
the principal decided that something had to be done.

She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the
maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major
problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night (you can
just imagine all the yawns from the little princesses).

To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she
asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He
took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the
mirror with it.

Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.

 

[nexTOme]

Portuguese words of the day

The teacher told Nuno to use the following words in a sentence.

1. *Cheese*
Nuno replies: Maria likes me, but cheese fat.

2. *Mushroom*
When all my family get in the car, there's not mushroom.

3. *Shoulder*
My fren wanted 2 become a citizen but she didn't know how to read
so I shoulder.

4. * Texas *
My fren always Texas me when I'm not home wondering where I'm at!

5. *Herpes*
Me and my fren ordered pizza. I got mine piece and she got herpes.

6. *July*
Ju told me ju were going to tha store and July to me! Julyer!

7. *Rectum*
I had 2 cars but my wife rectum!

8. *Chicken*
I was going to go to the store with my wife but chicken go herself.

9. *Wheelchair*
We only have one prego left, but don't worry wheelchair

10. *Chicken* *wing*
My wife plays the lottery so chicken wing.

11. *Harassment*
My wife caught me in bed with another women and I told her honey
harassment nothing to me.

12. *Bishop*
My wife fell down the stair so I had to pick the bishop.

13. *Body wash*
I want to go to the club but no body wash my kids.

14. *Budweiser*
That woman over there has a nice body, budweiser face so ugly?